I hear business owners say, “I know I shouldn’t take it so personally.”
I’ve never been very good at that myself.
I’ve owned businesses, grown up in a family business and spent most of my working life alongside business owners. I know how difficult it is to separate yourself from something you’ve poured so much of yourself into.
Why Business Feels So Personal
If you’ve spent years building a business, of course it’s personal. Your income is tied to it, your reputation is tied to it, your family has probably made sacrifices for it, and there are people who rely on you for their livelihood. You’ve made promises to clients, taken risks, worried about cash flow and carried responsibility that most people outside business will never really see.
Caring deeply about all of that isn’t a weakness. In many ways, it’s one of the great strengths of a good business owner.
When Emotional Investment Makes Decisions Harder
The difficulty comes when the business changes and that emotional investment starts making already difficult decisions even harder.
I’m working with a business owner through one of those situations at the moment. He has a team member who simply isn’t performing at the level the business now needs, but his sense of responsibility towards that person is enormous. He gave them a job, and the thought of potentially taking that job away weighs very heavily on him.
So he keeps stepping in.
He sacrifices his own time and goals, the performance of the business suffers, and other team members quietly pick up the load because they’re capable and they don’t complain. There’s now also a very real risk that a high-performing employee could eventually decide they’ve had enough.
How Clear Expectations Create Fairer Decisions
This hasn’t been a rushed decision. We’ve worked on the practical side first, putting systems and processes in place, establishing clear KPIs, workflow expectations and deadlines so the employee has had clarity around what the role requires and the opportunity to meet those expectations.
Unfortunately, they haven’t been able to.
That structure has become incredibly important because it gives us something objective to come back to when the emotion inevitably takes over. We can see what was expected, what support was provided, what has happened and what impact it is having on the rest of the business.
Compassion and Accountability Can Coexist
The next step is likely to be an exit, handled as kindly and supportively as it reasonably can be.
And he’s struggling with it.
I actually think that’s a credit to him. I would be far more concerned if taking away someone’s livelihood was an easy decision. But there comes a point where protecting one person from a difficult outcome starts creating difficult outcomes for everyone else, including the business owner himself.
This is where heart-led leadership needs structure around it.
Good systems, clear expectations, numbers, responsibilities and accountability don’t require us to become less human. They help us make fairer decisions when our emotions and sense of responsibility make it difficult to see the situation clearly.
The Courage to Make Difficult Business Decisions
Sometimes courage in business isn’t charging ahead fearlessly. It’s sitting with a decision you desperately wish you didn’t have to make, looking carefully at the reality in front of you and doing what needs to be done with as much kindness as you can.
And sometimes you need someone beside you while you do it.
Because business is personal, and some decisions are bloody hard.
Need More Clarity Around a Business Decision?
Is there a decision in your business that might become clearer if you had something more objective to work with?